After all the eulogies and stories this weekend…even after watching this Sunday morning’s “Meet the Press”–the very one that T. was preparing for when he died, … I’m still so sad. It’s no longer because of the loss of a great journalist or a weekly institution. It’s because everyday someone dies who has no intention to do so. He has heart disease. She’ll get hit by a car. It all happens so fast and without any control. And even more reason why we need to live and love every day.

I made sure on this Father’s Day to call my wonderful grandparents and share with both of them my gratitude and love.

I get it that Tim Russert was the fair yet tough interviewer. But why is it that that’s so unusual? It’s a sad state that the revered, honored, beloved journalists are the ones who are called tough and fair. Tough and fair are the two characteristics that every journalist should strive for.

And if journalistst today can’t do those two basic things–then yes, it’s true, Russert was the best and last great journalist of the times.

So sad. I feel so sad for his family and his colleagues at NBC. I always respected Tim Russert as a broadcast journalist. In a world where the lines between new and entertainment are constantly blurred, he seemed to be one of the best role models for aspiring reporters. My favorite part about reporting was when I’d ask the questions that made people pause and think. He did that so well.

As I hear more about his role as a mentor and good manager, it makes me really feel sad for his NBC family.

And hearing about the importance his family played in his life–that’s extra sad.

Well, hello there.

Every night after improv, or every time I return from doing something fun, or often when I hear or see something ridiculous, I think about this blog. And I think I should write. But then I don’t because other stuff gets in the way. And so it goes. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Improv the past two weeks has been incredible. Challenging? Yes, and so excellent. Last week I left class (it was about solidifying the scene) feeling a little blah–not as much as I had at other times, but just enough to overthink all my problematic scenes or exercises.

But then on Wednesday, J and I had practice with one of the classmates from his advanced class. HOLY WOW! I felt on-fire. Yes, there were scenes I did (we did just two person scenes) that were weaker, but overall, I felt myself doing some fabulous stuff. Really reaching deep and pulling out a big emotion or focusing on setting up a location. Wednesday practices give me faith that I may just be able to pick this improv stuff up afterall.

 Class yesterday heightened that feeling (look at me, using improv words outside of improv world!). The exercises were challenging, but I put my all into them. I felt silly at times, even botched up one–but I my classmates and instructors just rolled with it. And yes, it’s very true, mistakes in improv can be gems.

In one exercise, which seemed horribly terrifying in the beginning, we were given a location and had to play within the environment but without talking or pretending there was another person around. The teacher would call out expand and we’d play with whatever we were stuck on, finding different ways or bigger emotions to work with. When he called out advance, we’d continue along, advancing the scene, maybe finding someplace else to go or finding something else to pick up.

My place was the Metro. So I started by attempting to insert a Metro card into the slot. I hear “expand,” and I bend the card, rub the card, shove the card in again and again. At the cue “advance,” I put the card in my pocket, open the emergency exit gate and walk through. I’m now on the platform. I stretch out over the platform, crane my neck, looking for the train. I’m impatient. I check my watch. I sit down on the bench. I make a disgusted face and pull my bag closer to me, cross my legs and read. Eventually, after expanding and advancing, I’m frantically pacing the platform, yelling and grunting and so, so annoyed and furious that the train is not yet here. Oh, and I think it started raining too. Yeah, I yelled really loud.

I know there are ways I could’ve done better. I accidentally started “talking” to some invisible station manager before remembering we weren’t supposed to do that.  Instead, I could’ve just thrown down the card and walked through the gate. And I could’ve finally had the train arrive, and I’m so busy pacing and screaming that I miss it, causing more anger. I’m sure there are way better things I could’ve done if I was better at miming.

But I’m still awesomely proud of what I did. Mainly because I didn’t wait to be last.

I did a fun scene with Lisa too. Two catty girls–high schoolers, we’ll say–who were in a bathroom, making insults about hair and clothing. I can’t really recall specifics except something about a 1996 copy of Vogue and my acid-washed jeans. It seemed like we were listening, reacting and heightening, and the scene went fairly smoothly. Although, it was so conflict-y. When you heighten to the point that both people are yelling, how do lose and still say in character?!?

After class, as we all gathered our things to leave, the teacher reaffirmed that as you practice more and as you get more used to jumping in with emotions, characters, environment, relationship, heightening, it all really does become more natural and instinctual. Building up that mind muscle and stuff.

So, there ya go. Two weeks anticipating my next post, and it’s all about improv. I’ll throw in a few odds and ends to dilute its strong improv-concentration. This season of “Lost” is already amazing after only the premiere. Today is Fat Tuesday, and I’m seeing a whole bunch of people tonight and celebrate with fruity drinks. And Saturday is a fun trip to Annapolis with k.ball people.

Now only 96 percent improv.

I feel like … as we approach three hours from a new year, I should do a highs and lows of 2K7. In good stuff, I started a new job–and then a second new job–that got me away from the dead-end job I was working in 2006 and years before. I started a new hobby that has given me so much joy and opened my eyes to so much fun. I saw Jimmy Buffett again! And then in the fall I saw the Police. Both concerts were amazing. I started playing k.ball with new teams and people, which introduced me to new people.

In the not-so-bright moments, I began a new job that was incredibly stressful and left me feeling conflicted because while I enjoyed the challenge, and the atmosphere, the issue and most of my co-workers, certain problems and issues were not resolved in a positive way, letting conflict fester until eventually, I had to say, “Enough!” And then leave. I know I did what had to be done, but I still feel sad about leaving and like I didn’t accomplish all that I could have. I tried to lose a lot of weight this year, and instead gained much more weight. That, I feel, is my biggest disappointment. I feel like a bundle of big worry and stress because my grandmother is not in good health, and I don’t know what I can do to help, other than talking to her, and visiting with her as much as possible. It hurts a lot to see the person whom you love so much, who was always so strong and supportive of you, to see that person suffer. I flaked out on a lot of people and friends this year. I got into a minor yet incredibly costly car accident because I wasn’t paying attention. I ended a relationship with someone and am still in some kind of weird limbo regarding relationships.

Overall, 2007 was good. It was hard, but I can’t complain too much. Here’s to the fun and joy and better things that will come in ‘08.

Blogged with Flock

Yesterday was a day of feeling accomplished and creative — two feelings that don’t seem to come to me as much as they have in the past.

At work, I managed to complete a few assignments before deadline. Yes, before. This is rare for me. Especially when I have so much else I feel like I want to do. But nonetheless, good for me.

Work has felt incredibly great this past week, so much so that I am slowly losing the feeling, wondering if leaving my old job was the right idea. I was walking home from the Metro a few nights ago, thinking of all the ways that I should’ve started off the communications program at the old job. Instead of trying to overhaul everything at once, I should’ve done small things first. But the problem was, actually there were two problems, that they expected an immediate launching and that I did not have an agreeable communications assistant working for me.

So, not much that I really could’ve done afterall. I’m so much happier here, and I know I’ll get past some of the things I originally saw as pitfalls (like so big, expensive lunches for my birthday.) (They did however give me a surprise gathering with delicious raspberry chocolate cake. And I really don’t like cake very much, so me saying it was delicious means it’s very true.)

Last night was Wednesday so that meant another imformal improv practice session. Last night I started to feel it. I started to feel what happens when you and your partner listen, support, heighten and find the pattern and then create some really awesome scenerios and fun scenes (maybe even funny). It felt amazing!

I’ve witnessed my classmates do such things previously, and I think I’ve probably even done a scene or two where everything felt perfectly pulled together. But last night seemed like the first time that I did it once and could keep doing it well in any scene we did. No matter the word, no matter who I was playing with, the three of us created magic.

Some scenes I loved doing:

• monks – Two of us chanting about craving pizza while a third monk (who won’t chant and therefore we chant how we don’t hear anyone talking) tempts us to stop chanting by bringing us pizza.
• kneecap – Two people talking about how they are going to bust out my kneecap while I obliviously practice some weird blend of tai chi, dancing, Rockette kicking, and stretches. They spend so much time discussing the best way to do it, that they never get to actually take me down.
• bookstore – One person is a customer at a counter buying books, I’m a clerk. Behind the customer is someone completely ticked off at how long we are talking about the customer signing up to join our special membership club, receive a copy of the enewsletter, get free gift wrapping, etc. The annoyed guy (not buying anything) just wants to know where 4th street is, but no one in the store has heard of 4th street (I call it out over the PA system to all the customers, naturally). The scene ends when we discover the guy is in the wrong city.
• Hawaii – We’re doing cardio-hula, of course.

Not only was I getting it, but I seemed to be doing more object work and more emotions! And reacting! Oh my gosh, I may actually be OK at this improv stuff afterall.

So thank goodness classes start in mid-January. I’ve been getting a good fix between practicing and attending the holiday shows. But real classes will just be awesome.

After practice, I went to Blues Alley in Georgetown to see Bob Baldwin. I had never seen nor heard of Bob before, but a fan invited me to see it and I agreed. I had always wanted to check out Blues Alley because it seemed like the closest thing to the blues bar venues I’d go to while in Chicago.

The place was fabulous and intimate. The music was fun and captivating. I want Bob and his band to perform at my wedding (not that that’s happening anytime soon). That’s how awesome the show was.

Wednesday was a great night for improv of the theatrical and musical kind.

Been awhile since I’ve been here. I guess things have been a little busy with the end of one job and the start of another. K.ball has also come to an end and so has my improv class. There’s still the student showcase to do, but the classes are over.

Finishing old job happened quickly and with a few surprises that I obviously won’t discuss here since that’s all personal and whatnot. When I left my previous two jobs–I did so feeling really good and knowing it was time for something new. Since I had been at this most recent job only nine months, I wasn’t leaving with that same sense of accomplishment. It took several days to get past those feelings, but since starting my new, new job, I’ve been feeling better. Among other things, it felt good being out with people, and when I was asked the ho-hum DC question (“What do you do?”), I answered with a simple, “work at an association.” The questioner then found out which one and was all, “That’s THE association!”

It’s really not.

But several hundred people work there, and it’s quite established. And it’s the first time in my life (since interning) that I’ve worked at a big, established, notable place where I don’t have describe or explain my workplace when asked what I do and where I do it.

And because I’m a dork–I’m especially excited that it has its own facebook network. Which I quicky joined even though work does not let us view facebook, as well as many other websites deemed inappropriate or security risks.

So new job is so far, so good. Nothing too hard has been thrown my way. I do miss a lot of the freedom that comes with working as part of a 5-person staff. All the travel, the credit card to buy whatever. But again, the lower-level stress is really, REALLY nice.

Improv — Hmm…well, 1A is done. I haven’t spent time the past few weeks dissecting and analyzing the classes and how I’ve done. I dunno. It’s kinda hard. I felt good about some moments, not so good about others. Story-telling and emotional reacting–not as easy to get as “just agree and do something.” Our class finally gelled, which was nice, and we’re all talking about taking 1B together, which is doubly nice. But I still worry about sucking. Even moreso now. I’m sure my negative thoughts about sucking just make it more difficult for me. At any rate, improv was super fun. I met cool new people. Discovered so many new things, and did I mention it was super fun? It was incredibly fun. I can’t wait until the next class starts in January or so.

Other random droppings:

• Bought a 32-inch LCD TV. Feel weird spending $600+ of money that I’ve saved, but I think it’s a good investment.
• Saw The Police with friends at the Verizon Center. OMG. How much do I love Sting and The Police?  Pretty much a lot. The concert was incredible.
• Booked plane ticket for post-Thanksgiving vacation. Going to Arizona/Mexico/Las Vegas for eight days with Delta G and the Bedazzlers. This is my first vacation in more than a year, and my first visit to Las Vegas. Excited? VERY! It’s also my own celebration to myself to honor my 31st birthday.
• Still waiting for car to be repaired. Sigh. Insurance sucks blahblahblah. I’m rethinking the idea of getting rid of the car–it’s actually been kinda difficult not having the freedom to take off and go at any whim.
• New favorite pumpkin food: Pumpkin ravioli salad from Whole Foods. I’ve been searching Google for a recipe but without any luck. I need to buy more of the salad and figure out how to re-create it. That would surely be my greatest culinary feat.

Blogged with Flock

I’m walking this morning from Union Station to generic office building a few blocks away. It’s shortly after 9 a.m. An interesting looking woman in clippity cloppity heels briskly passes me. She’s not what I’d consider attractive, but I guess I am wrong.

A mid-30s looking man with broad shoulders, close-cut hair, shirt, tie, no jacket–very DC looking–catches up to me and sees the woman just slightly ahead of us. I watch him give her a look that I can only imagine a stereotypical DC guy would give to mean: That is good! I want that!

“I think it may rain today,” he says to the woman, who is wearing khaki-colored dress pants with a sleeveless green sweater top. She responds with a half-hearted remark that leads to friendly conversation about weather.

It feels cool, he says, but not cold. It will soon be cold. She keeps engaging him.

I quicken my pace to keep up because I can just sense where this is going.

At the traffic-light controlled intersection, we all pause. She begins to make a move suggesting she is turning the corner.

“Hi, I’m <insert name> here. What is your name name?”

She gives her name–it sounds like Connecticut. I really hope I heard that wrong.

As I look between the intersection, waiting for the walk sign, and look toward their way, I see him place his hand in his pants pocket, and like a magician with a white rabbit, a white business card amazingly appears.

She accepts it, has no card to give him back. But they talk more until the light says to walk. She goes her way, he crosses the street with me.

All the while, he keeps turning around, glancing back at the space where she used to be. We enter the same building, and I slow my pace. I’m not interested in riding the elevator with him.

Elevator sharing can be awkward enough sometimes. I’d imagine it’s even more awkward (for me at least) when you’ve just witnessed a DC guy at his game.

Now I wonder. Will she call him? Email him? Ignore him? How many more business cards will he conveniently pull from his pants pocket today and hand out to other women? Is he married? Will he post a missed connection on Craigslist? What would this scene be like if acted out by an improv troupe (because I’m obsessed and all that.) Will I see them again, maybe in six months, holding hands as they walk together from the Metro to their generic office buildings?

Why did I find her oddly unattractive while this man jumped to the opportunity to talk to her?

And all this time, I’ve been looking to structured social activities as a way to meet more people. For the right people, in the right places, it may be just as simple as walking down the street. And always having your pristine, unwrinkled business card in your pocket.

I’m so happy it’s Friday and the week is over. That means I’m just a few days closer to Improv class No. 3!

(Oh, no. Not another post about beloved improv!)

Since no one reads this anyway, and since it’s basically replaced my pen-to-paper journal, I will spend as much time as I want retelling tales of improv.

On Wednesday a small group of us arrived early to do a few drills and lines for a local cable channel that was doing a piece on the improv school. I know I shouldn’t have been nervous, but I was working with some of the “professionals” (as I have been calling them) and I was just like, “Well, I’ve done only one class, so I really don’t know anything and so I’m just like <blank stare>.” While I didn’t do so hot, I was OK with it, because I think it will be good to show the range of experience and illustrate that even the blankest minds can have fun with improv classes.

So afterwards we went downstairs to meet up with our class. As was previous, it was so fun and so enlightening. We played Big Booty again and I was able to keep my spot for the entire time. Stuart was trying his best to screw me up, but HA! I am too bootylicious for that. Next week will be really fun because everyone will be going for my jugular. Bring it. It will actually be really, very fun when I finally get out.

Reading “Truth in Comedy” has really helped me out so much as I go into the class each week. I completely understand the point of not working to be funny. Funny just happens when you act out naturally. I think that’s why “The Office” and “Arrested Development” are just so much more hysteric than, say “How I Met Your Mother.” None of the characters from the two former shows are trying to crack jokes and one-liners. Everyone is just developing relationships and interacting with other characters. Absurdity and randomness that tie together and bring a set of scenes full circle — THAT is what’s funny.

Highlight of the class was a group of three or four with one person telling a story and the others in the group miming the actions of the story. Again, not a good storytelling week for me. This is obviously my weakness. I’m still hoping and waiting for my natural ability to click.

After class, Joe and I went to My Brother’s Place to get food, but the kitchen was closed so we headed over to Hamilton’s. And we talked improv, improv, improv, a little bit of kickball, and then more improv. It was fabulous.

Yesterday I checked out an apartment in Old Town Alexandria. The craigslist ad sounded promising and the guy rented out the other room seemed cool enough. But when I arrived my eyes must’ve shown my expression of shock because the conversation rapidly became awkward. Smaller than a closet. So, so very small. Possibly even too small for a one-bedroom. As I left and walked back to the Metro, my gut was that this was not a good fit, but I kept making up things to convince myself I could do it. I could get rid of some of my furniture and clothes. I could even get rid of my car if there’s no cheap parking. The list went on.

But as the night went on too, I just knew it was a bad idea.

Luckily, the renter must’ve sensed the same, because he emailed me this morning, saying he selected someone else.

I feel a little rejected (YOU can’t reject ME!) but ultimately, it was a good call. At least it’s not one that has to be made by me. Honestly, I should’ve just expressed my true sense of “well, this is much smaller than I expected” when I first walked in. That would’ve saved both of us a lot of time and effort, rather than me saying, “Oh, this is really cute. I don’t have a TV so I’d be in good shape. (awkward half-laugh)”

So thus continues the adventures of Brewmistress looking for a new home — chances are, I will be living in Silver Spring again. Sigh.

I visited the house that a friend is possibly going to rent. We didn’t have the keys to get in, but I was able to see its location, the exterior and a bit of inside while peeping through windows. Location, indeed! Only two, maybe three blocks, from the Clarendon metro stop. Hopefully all will go well, and if it does, I will be moving out of Mo. Co. and in to Northern Virginia.

I don’t want to dwell much on that, however, because there are still too many uncertainties.

After visiting the house and having a few drinks at Whitlow’s, (It was mug night. I actually bought a mug this time. Hopefully I’ll get to use it frequently.) I went to MBP to catch up with the Thursday k.ball crew. I must’ve told at least six people about improv. I recapped some of the funny moments and excitedly gushed about how fun and comfortable the class is. J and I are going to have such a huge fan section during the showcase.

Then I was home and I was thinking about what I want to be when I grow up. I glanced through some of my bookmarks on Safari and found one for a page on personal histories. I then remembered how I previously talked of starting my own business writing personal histories and memoirs.

As I walked to the Metro this morning, I kept thinking about it, coming up with all the many ways I could make it work. This area especially has so much wealth and so many people who have such great stories. It just seems like the perfect place.

Meanwhile, back in real world, current job is what it is. High points and low points. Etc. Etc. Thank goodness it’s Friday.